


The Thin Blue Line

by Marie_Phantom



Series: Tumbleweed (Blowing In The Wind) [10]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Mpreg, Multi, Odin's A+ Parenting, Past Miscarriage, Past Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-02
Updated: 2015-01-02
Packaged: 2018-03-04 01:58:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2905127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marie_Phantom/pseuds/Marie_Phantom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki discovers he is pregnant, and embarks on an immediate campaign not to tell anyone, for fear his baby will be taken away or he will be forced to miscarry. His previous experience tells him this, and he is never wrong.</p><p>Luckily, Thor is a bit more perceptive than most.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Thin Blue Line

**Author's Note:**

> This is the beginning of the third arc of Tumbleweed. I suppose that I should explain the arcs.
> 
> Arc One: Everything up until He's Worth Waiting For.
> 
> Arc Two: Up until the Thin Blue Line.
> 
> Arc Three: Thin Blue Line onwards.

It's not a surprise that it's Bucky who finds Loki curled up in the bathroom. He was sitting under the sink, knees under his chin as he stared at the plastic strip lying where it was thrown against the wall. 

"Loki?" Bucky asked, stepping in to the room. He sat on the lid of the toilet and nudged the side of Loki's head with his elbow.

"Bucky." Loki murmured.

"Loki what's wrong?" Bucky was getting worried. It had been so long since he had seen Loki like this. He had been doing so much better, with Thor as a constant by his side and Bucky as his friend and sounding board.

Loki kept his mouth shut, but gestured to to the plastic strip lying on the floor in front of him. His dull green eyes didn't move from where they lay. Bucky leaned forward and picked up the strip. He looked at it in confusion.

"The box, on the sink." Loki said. He leaned his head against Bucky's knee. Bucky picked up the box and looked at the back, switching his gaze from the strip and the box until he understood. His eyes widened and he nearly dropped the box and the strip as he looked down sharply at Loki.

"You're pregnant." He said softly. He lay his hands on his lap and looked into Loki's eyes, which were glazed with terror and apprehension both.

"I am with child, yes."

"Does Thor know?" Bucky asked, and then immediately knew the answer. Thor had not changed in attitude at all, whilst if he knew that Loki was pregnant he would he jubilant, practically floating off the floor. Nevertheless, Loki shook his head and then suppressed a sob, leaning his face into Bucky's knee as he wept.

"Why are you crying?' Bucky asked as he slipped off the toilet and gathered Loki into his arms, rocking his back and forth as he remembered he used to do for his sisters.

"Because I am  _pregnant_ , you fool!" Loki hissed, scrunching up his face as he drew back, unconsciously pressing his hands to his belly. "Because I have a child in my womb, and nothing good has happened to me from that!"

Bucky couldn't understand. Yes, he knew about the numerous miscarriages and abortions Loki had endured at the hands of the Chitauri. He even knew about the baby he had miscarried in prison in Asgard as he awaited his trial, a child of himself and one of the men he had enslaved during his brief time on Midgard. But Loki had other children. Children still alive, children on Midgard! Bucky said all of this to Loki, and watched with a tearing heart as Loki cried and laughed at the same time.

"Yes, my live children have brought me joy! But by being my children I have also brought misery to their lives. Children from my body are cursed, simply by being children of Loki! I will not allow a child to suffer of being mine, I cannot put myself through that again or my heart will break!"

"But this is Thor's child! This is your partners child, your husband in all but word! He is loved in Asgard and on Earth. I can't think of any better protection." Bucky had never been more confused since he had lain alongside Steve in the hospital and his fractured world had finally begun to mend.

"Odin will kill it." Loki murmured. He lay back against the tile wall and stared unseeing at the ceiling light.

"Your father?" 

"He is not my father. But yes, he will kill it. Or enslave it, if it is born and semi-grown by the time he finds out." 

Bucky leaned against the toilet and stared at Loki. He chewed his lip as he thought. "That's what happened to Sleipnir."

Loki nodded.

"Loki, you're not on Asgard." Bucky leaned forward and took Loki's hands, sliding his across the floor until he leaned back against Bucky's chest. His head rolled against Bucky's shoulder and he pressed his lips softly against Bucky's throat. Bucky slid his hand over and over against Loki's soft black hair. 

"The old man has spies everywhere." Loki whispered. Bucky sighed and tucked his head against Loki's.

"He'll have to get through all of us to get to you. Thor would rather die that let his lay a hand on you or your child." Bucky was fervent. He knew where is loyalty lay. With Steve, with Loki, with Thor and the rest of the Avengers. The rest of the world could go hang, for all he cared.

"That is a beautiful sentiment, but you do not know that Allfathers power. He will walk over your corpses, put his hand on my belly and kill my baby." Loki laughed without humour, which ended in a sob. Bucky pressed his lips to Loki's hair.

"I would rather die than let that happen." Loki said, picking up Bucky's hand and pressing a kiss into the palm.

"You should trust us." Bucky admonished. 

"It is not that I don't trust you. I do. I trust all of you. But I only have my precious experience of pregnancy to fall back on, and it has never ended well for me."

"This time will be different. I promise you, you and the baby will be safe as soon as you tell everyone."

These were the wrong words to say, as Loki pushed himself off of Bucky and turned around, lips pulled back over his now-enlarged teeth and his longer nails scraping lengths into the tile. The scars of his heritage pushed through his skin and he looked feral as a stray cat.

"No one can know." He hissed, pointing on long finger and claw at Bucky. Bucky held up his hands and opened his mouth, but Loki hissed, so Bucky closed it again. "No one can know. You will not tell a soul."

"Okay. Okay Loki, I won't tell."

"No. One."

"Yes. It's a secret." Bucky knew that Loki needed to tell Thor, but Loki was currently beyond reason, half-way to his natural form and filled with protective rage for his baby.

Loki breathed heavily for a few more seconds, eyeing Bucky before he nodded his head sharply. He stood up and picked up the box and the test, shoving them into the back pockets of his jeans before striding out of the door. Bucky followed, turning off the lights, and nearly ran into Thor.

"Is Loki alright?" Thor asked, staring after Loki with concerned eyes. Bucky swallowed his confession and gave an (unconvincing) smile.

"Yeah, he just banged his knee off the sink."

Thor stared at him with a stony face. "Banged his knee." He said flatly.

"Damnedest thing." Bucky swallowed at Thor's face dipped further and further into a frown. However, he turned away and walked towards the exit. Bucky thought he was on the home stretch when Thor looked over his shoulder at Bucky, pinning him with his stormy eyes.

"Don't lie to me again."

Bucky tried to swallow through dry mouth. "Nope." He managed to squeak out. Thor looked at him again and nodded, walking out of the flat. Bucky deflated like a burst balloon and walked on legs like noodles to the elevator, punching the button to take him to his and Steve's floor and leaning back against the wall. The door pinged over and Bucky walked over to the couch, practically throwing himself over Steve's lap.

"Sometimes I really hate people." He muttered darkly into Steve's stomach. He felt Steve stroke his hair.

"Any particular reason why?" Steve asked, not looking up from his book.

"Just do."

"Hhhhmmm."

They lay in silence, as Steve read and Bucky stewed.

He hated keeping secrets.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

There was no desirable change in Loki's demeanour in the following days, and Thor wasn't acting any differently, so Bucky knew that the pregnancy was still a secret. What did worry Bucky was that Loki was eating exactly the same amount as he always did.

Even Bucky knew that pregnant people had to eat more, for the baby. But Loki was more adamant on maintaining his cover than caring for his baby.

So Bucky, when he knows that Thor and Steve are in the gym beating the shit out of each other, goes to Loki's floor with as many cookies he can carry, and a bowl of freshly made fish salad tucked beneath his chin. He figures that there is something Loki will eat.

The elevator door opened and he walked out to the sound of Loki being copiously sick. He sighed, puts the treats in the kitchen and walked to the bathroom where Loki was hugging the toilet. His hair was stuck to his face with sweat and tears are squeezed from his eyes each time his stomach forces him to hurl.

"That bad, huh?" Bucky asked, already wetting a cloth and laying it on the back of Loki's neck. Loki moaned with relief and rested his face on the rim, eyes closed and face calm.

"Yes."

"Has it ever been this bad before?"

Loki nodded. "Hela. I think it was her own magic warring with mine, but I vomited for almost the entire pregnancy. Made it very difficult to conceal it."

"How long do your pregnancies usually last for?" Bucky asked, sitting beside Loki and rubbing his shoulder.

"12 months."

Bucky gaped. "A year?! A whole fucking year?! How do you plan on hiding this for a year?"

"I don't know!" Loki hissed. He turned his head and eyed Bucky. "I haven't really thought about that."

"Or are you trying to starve your baby out of your body, so you won't have to tell Thor?" Bucky said coldly. The temperature dropped in the room, but Loki made no move to attack. Instead, he looked sad and somewhat defeated.

"I don't want my baby to die." He murmured. He sat up from the toilet and hugged his belly.

"You gotta eat more." Bucky coaxed. He took the cloth from Loki's neck and washed his face. Loki sighed and leaned in to the cloth. 

"C'mon." Bucky tugged Loki up by the elbow and lead him to the kitchen. Loki smiled when he saw the spread and made straight for the salad, peeling back the cling film and digging in with the fork provided, stuffing his cheeks.

"Thanks." He said around the food and carried on eating. Bucky sat down and fished out a cookie from the bag, eating it slowly.

Loki finished the salad in quick time and started on the cookies, stuffing them into his mouth like he was afraid it was going to disappear.

"So how many weeks are you?" Bucky eventually asked. Loki swallowed and closed his eyes, mentally counting.

"About five weeks along, if I remember correctly."

"When do you start to show?" Bucky looked at Loki's practically concave stomach, trying and failing to imagine it swelling with life.

"Around the seventh month. Although I have showed around the fourth, when I was with Fenrir." Loki smiled grimly as he remembered the layered clothes and the countless charms he had worn so that he could go about the palace without seeming pregnant. It had been much easier with Sleipnir. He had been in his horse form for the duration of the pregnancy and had had Svartilfari with him for the entire time.

"Oh." Bucky ate another cookie as he thought. "How does it...? I mean, how do you...?"

Loki laughed as Bucky turned red, and laughed harder when Bucky chocked on his cookie, trying to phrase the question. "You know how I am anatomically built. It is much the same way as a women."

"Oh, that's easy." Bucky said with relief. He remembered helping his mother with the birth of Rebecca.

"But no less painful."

"Yeah."

They ate more cookies, and then Bucky, seeing that Loki was flagging, helped him to his room and tucked him into bed. He was leaving the apartment when Thor came in, sweating and already pulling off his top. He narrowed his eyes when he saw Bucky, and for once did not grin.

"Bucky."

"Hi Thor." Bucky tried to smile winningly, but felt it falter when Thor's expression did not change. He gestured to the kitchen behind him. "I brought cookies. I even think there are some left."

"Indeed." Thor continued to look at him, and Bucky felt himself start to sweat. 

"I'll just be going then." He said and made his way to the elevator. He was stopped by a large hand planting itself on his shoulder, and he turned to look at Thor.

"Is there something you wish to tell me, Bucky?" Thor's voice was quiet, and soft, and very even.

Bucky had been the Winter Soldier, had committed countless horrible acts and had never once faltered in his duties (until it mattered), but for the first time in his life, he was genuinely scared.

"No, Thor. I have nothing to say to you." He squared his shoulders and picked up Thor's hand, allowing it to drop by his side. He moved to the exit and was about to leave when he heard Thor say "Do not keep secrets from me Bucky. I can always tell."

Bucky felt a swell of rage inside of him and turned to Thor, bearing his teeth in anger. "It's not my secret to tell."

Thor continued to look at him with that maddeningly even expression. Bucky chucked his chin in goodbye and stormed to the elevator, nearly breaking the button to his floor in anger. Bucky was right. Loki's pregnancy was not his to tell, and Loki knew this. Bucky just hoped that Loki did something about it before it became too late.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Two weeks later, and Loki was finally eating for two. But nothing else had happened, and New York was enjoying unique and somewhat puzzling summer storms as Thor walked around with a face that was growing darker and darker. Communication between him and Loki had broken down to monosyllabic questions and answers, and Thor shorted out the power in the Tower for a whole night when Tony (somewhat) crassly asked if the 'Happy Couple' had broken up. Thor had snapped his utensils in two and stormed off to his apartment, whilst Loki had snarled a warning at Tony to stay out of their marriage and had gone in the opposite direction to the roof. 

Tony had spent the night on the couch along with Clint, who had been milliseconds from asking the question himself (and Natasha knew it, here the banishment).

As Bucky was still the only person in the Tower who knew about the pregnancy, and was therefore the only person helping Loki along with it, once afternoon saw him hanging around the medical wing, waiting to Betty Ross to come out.

"Oh!" she said, glancing up from her notes to look at Bucky. "Hi, James."

"Bucky, please ma'am."

Betty smiled and held the notes to her chest. "Bucky then. What can I do for you?"

Bucky shifted his feet but reigned in his nervousness. "I need to ask you some medical questions."

Betty sighed and ran a hand through her long dark hair. She jerked her head and Bucky followed her to her office, where she closed the door rather harshly and slammed the notes onto her desk.

"I don't know why everyone in the Tower persists in the belief that Bruce and I are medical doctors." She sounded tired, rather than angry. She sat down and took her hair out of het ponytail. Bucky through idly that in another life she would have been exactly his type.

"I know that. We know that. But you're the closest thing to personal doctors we all have, and I need your advice."

Betty tilted her head and looked at Bucky. "Couldn't you have asked Bruce?"

Bucky shook his head. "I need the advice of a woman."

Now Betty looked suspicious. "Why?" she asked slowly.

"It's...I..." Bucky sighed frustratedly and ran a hand through his hair. "I have...a friend."

"A friend."

"Yeah, a friend. And h-  _she's_ pregnant. And she can't go to any doctors, I can't force her. I'm the only person who knows, she won't tell her partner, and she relies on me for support. But she won't take care of the baby, because she's lost a lot of them, and she has living children, but she can't see them, and she's so, _so_  scared about this baby, and I'm the only person she can talk to." Bucky said all of this and then heaved a breath. Betty observed this wide wide eyes and an open mouth. She snapped it shut and leaned in to Bucky, pulling his arm until he sat down beside her.

" _Did you cheat on Steve and knock up some slut_ _?!_ " she hissed. Bucky felt himself grow cold at the accusation.

"How dare you?" he said, slow and cold.

"If you do anything to hurt Steve-"

"I would die for him. I have died for him, and I would do it again in a heartbeat." Bucky pulled his arm free and sat back, crossing his arms.

Betty regarded him with narrowed eyes, before she blew out a breath and also sat back.

"What do you need to know?" she asked finally. Bucky heaved a sigh of relief and leaned forward.

"Okay, it's a long pregnancy, so how long before she can go without a check-up?"

"Well," Betty started, getting up and pulling out a medical textbook from her library, "she'll want to get seen as soon as possible..."

 

 

************

 

 

That night, Bucky exited the bathroom to find Steve leaning back against the headboard, face stony and arms crossed as he stared at Bucky.

"I've done something, haven't I." Bucky sat, sitting down at the end of the bed and putting his hand on Steve's ankles. Steve allowed it, which was a good sign.

"Betty Ross said that you've been asking some interesting questions."

Bucky scowled and pulled himself so that he sat alongside Steve. He laid his head on Steve's shoulder. Steve didn't put his arm around Bucky as he normally did, but his shoulder softened.

"Fucking patient doctor confidentiality, my ass." Bucky mumbled into the t-shirt.

"Why were you asking questions about pregnancy?" Steve said. His voice was even, but Bucky, who had know him his entire life. There was a slight, very slight, tremble in his voice that spoke to Bucky of anxiety and slight worry.

"I've not done wrong by you." Bucky said, whispering into Steve's neck. "I promise, you're the only person I've been with."

"I know that." Steve finally relented a pressed a kiss to Bucky's head. 

"Then why are you angry?"

"Because, my love, you didn't come to me with your problems first." Steve wrapped Bucky in his arms and laid down on the bed. Bucky turned off the light and snuggled down into the covers with Steve.

"It's my responsibility." Bucky said.

"We promised to share everything when we made out vows. You shouldn't have had to shoulder this by yourself. It's not fair on you."

"She won't talk to anyone else. I'm the only person she feels remotely comfortable talking to about this."

They lay in silence, none of them speaking until he felt Steve sigh and say "It's Loki, isn't it?"

Bucky froze, but Steve rubbed his back and eventually he relaxed again. "How did you know?"

Steve laughed without humour. "Eating for two. He's never been a huge eater, and now he clears at least two plates at dinner."

"He could have just got a huge appetite."

"Not Loki, not like that. You forget, I talk to him too."

Bucky huffed a laugh as he remembered, and then snuggled deeper into Steve's embrace. "Yeah, I forgot you do."

"We have very interesting conversations."

"Of course."

"About many different subjects."

"Yep."

"Stop humouring me, punk."

Bucky giggled and punched Steve lightly in the stomach, causing him to huff and double over. Bucky took the opportunity to spread himself over Steve, which in turn caused Steve to sink deeper and deeper into the mattress.

"How is this helping Loki?" Steve voice was muffled by the sheets.

"It's not." Bucky said. He grinned at Steve in the dark. "But it's making you feel better."

"Yeah." They settled down again, and Steve lay on his back with Bucky draped across his chest.

"He's got to tell Thor." Steve said finally. 

"I think Thor already knows." Bucky said after a long silence, flexing the fingers of his left hand against the sheets and feeling the fibres strain. "It would explain the weather."

"Then you'd think he's be happy." Steve frowned in confusion. "He's always wanted children, and now he has one on the way."

"I think that it's more the matter that Loki hasn't told him, and seems bound and determined to keep it a secret."

"It's dangerous. For both him and the baby." Steve said and hugged Bucky tighter.

"I know. I was talking with Betty, and because Loki has miscarried so many children, and so recently, there's a high chance that he might abort this one. And he knows this." Bucky sighed sadly. "I think, and I'm just spitballing here, that he's trying to spare Thor the pain if he does lose the baby."

"That's wrong. Thor would bend over backwards if he thought it would help." Steve was starting to drift off, and rolled over, pulling Bucky with him. "He's got to tell him."

"We can't interfere." Bucky murmured into warm skin, already starting to sleep.

Their dreams that night were not pleasant ones, both dreaming of eyes (green and red) closed with death, and thighs fingered red with blood.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

"You've got to tell him." Bucky sat by Loki on the couch, both watching the news as the Avengers battled monsters. Loki was tired and looking pale, and his hair, which Bucky was braiding, was stringy and greasy. 

"I can't." Loki whispered. He was so tired his eyes hurt. Thor was still sharing his bed, but slept with his back to Loki. Loki hadn't felt this isolated since Thor had been sent to Midgard so many years before.

"Loki, you need help."

"I can do this by myself. I have done so before, and I can do it again."

"That's a shit mantra, and you know it." Bucky finished braiding and spun Loki around. He tipped Loki's chin up in his hand and forced Loki to look into his eyes. "I know you're scared that you'll lose the baby, and I know that you want to spare Thor that, but Loki, this is killing you. You need Thor."

"I am Loki!" Loki hissed and jerked his head away. "I don't need anyone."

"That's bullshit!" Bucky's carefully held temper finally snapped. "That's bullshit! You NEED Thor, you need him, and you're killing yourself and your baby and driving him away because you're too fucking proud to tell him you're pregnant! What are you so scared of, huh? What has you, Loki, God of Mischief and Fire, so scared that you won't tell your partner you carry his child? You are the safest you'll ever be! What are you scared someone is going to steal your baby? Someone is going to come along and take...it...away..."

Bucky trailed off when he saw Loki's face turn sheet white. He started to sweat and his tongue came out to moisten his lips, but Loki didn't speak. Instead he tried, numerous times, but no sound left his lips.

"You're scared someone is going to steal your baby." Bucky finally said. Loki looked down, ashamed, but slowly nodded his head.

"Sleipnir." Bucky breathed, remembering his history. 

"My firstborn. My baby boy, taken from me by Odin." Loki was exhausted. He leaned back against the couch and closed his eyes, but did not bother to wipe away the tears that streaked his cheeks.

"And your others."

"Cast out before they could reach adulthood. Well," Loki shrugged, "Jormungandr was nearly an adult when he was sent away, Fenrir ran away before he could be killed and Hela was taken to the Otherworld when she was the Midgardian equivalent of 16."

Bucky snuggled up next to Loki and leaned his head against Loki's shoulder. "You know that we wouldn't let anything happen to your baby."

Loki snorted derisively. "That's sweet of you to say, but you do not know that power the Allfather wields."

"I think you underestimate us."

"Bucky, I have been defeated by all of you. Believe me when I say that I do not underestimate any of the Avengers. But the Allfather has a tongue as silver as mine, and he could charm a tree to stop growing leaves should he wish it."

"Loki, I want you to listen to me." Bucky sat up and looked into Loki's tired and weary eyes. "I love this baby. Steve loved this baby. Yes, he knows. I would die for this baby. The Tower, when it finds out (and it will), will do anything to protect this baby. Thor, when you tell him is going to move the heavens and the earth for this baby, for he will love it most of all. You need to trust him."

"Trust does not come easy to someone like me." Loki whispered. But Bucky did notice that Loki didn't disagree with him.

"Loki, tell him. Tell him, and we can protect you. Tell him, and you and your baby can  _live_."

Loki bit his lip, and then nodded. "Alright. I'll tell him. I'll tell him soon."

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

But the decision was taken out of Loki's hands.

He held off from telling Thor for 5 days, planning on telling him on the weekend, but Thor came in to their rooms to change for dinner. He stopped at the door when he heard a loud moaning from the bathroom, and he went to the locked door and knocked.

"Loki, is that you?" he asked. Loki didn't reply with words, but instead moaned louder which ended in a hiccup. Thor frowned and leant his full weight, which made the wood creak. "Loki, answer me." 

Loki didn't answer, and Thor heard the ruffle of cloth moving. He breathed in deep and his heart nearly stopped in his chest when he caught the faint whiff of blood.

"Loki, I'm coming in." Thor stood backwards and kicked the door in, and stopped dead in the doorway when he caught sight of Loki.

Loki was sitting on the floor of the bathroom, the tiles smeared with blood. His trousers and pants were off, and he was mopping up the blood with them, all the while moaning and crying.

"Oh, Loki." Thor breathed. He came in to the room and knelt by Loki, putting a hand on his back. Thor noticed that he was sweating through his shirt, even though his body was ice cold.

"Not again, not again." Loki wept. He kept mopping.

"Loki, you need to see a doctor." Thor said, putting his arms around Loki and lifting him off the floor. Loki was a dead weight in his arms. He dropped his clothes and put his bloody hand over his face, unable to stand the sight of his failure.

"Loki, I am taking you to a doctor. But you have to calm down." Thor re-arranged Loki until he was carrying him in a firemans lift. Loki wept harder and smeared his face  into Thor's shirt. "Loki, I am not angry with you. This was an accident."

"I failed again. I failed. I am so sorry, so very very sorry." Loki didn't stop crying, and Thor, seeing that Loki wasn't calming down, hurried to the elevator and pushed the button for the medical floor with his elbow. He pressed his lips into Loki's hair and tried not to think about the baby he might have lost. 

The door the medical floor opened and Thor stormed out, roaring for Bruce as he stormed to the nearest examination room. Bruce stuck his head out of the door to tell Thor to stop screaming, but swallowed what he had said when he saw Loki crying in Thor arm's.

"What's happened?" He asked, already pulling on gloves.

"I think he is miscarrying his baby." Thor said, laying Loki down on a table and stroking the hair from his face. Bruce froze.

"Baby?"

"Yes, he is three months pregnant and he may be miscarrying." 

"Why was I not informed?" Bruce said, scooting a chair to the end of the bed. He gestured for Loki to open his legs, but Loki kept them tight shut.

"He has informed no one but Bucky."

"Not even you? Loki, cooperate." Bruce sounded frustrated. He was trying to open Loki's legs, but they were practically glued together.

"No. Loki, love, Bruce needs to see. Otherwise you might die." Thor turned his attention to Loki, who was now crying silently. Loki swallowed heavily and allowed his legs to flop open. He closed his eyes and seemed to drift off, separating his mind from his body and falling in to a state of torpor.

"Good." Bruce said and leaned in.

 

 

**********

 

 

It was night when Loki came to, lying in a comfortable hospital bed with an I.V in his arm. He opened his eyes and saw Thor sitting in a chair next to him, one hand around Loki's and the other pillowing his head against the bed.

Loki rolls over in bed and strokes Thor's hair, the needle pulling at his skin. He tried not to think about the events that led him to be lying in the hospital. He closed his eyes and swallowed around the lump in his throat.

"Loki, look at me." Loki jumped and opened his eyes. Thor was looking at him with those blue eyes as blank as they had been for the last few weeks.

"I am extremely angry with you."

"I know. and I'm so sorry." Loki whispered. He clutched at the hand he held and kissed the palm, unable to look Thor in the eyes.

"Loki, the baby is still alive."

Loki felt as if his breath had been stolen in his chest. His heart, which had stopped, now started beating fast. He released Thor's hand and rolled over on to his back, putting a hand over his eyes with relief. His death hitched and he struggled not to cry again, but due to his hormones racing through his body, he couldn't help the tears that were squeezed out of the corner of his eyes.

"Loki, the baby is alive and healthy. Bruce managed to stop the bleeding, but you are on rest until it is born. Nothing strenuous."

They sat (or lay) in silence for a while, until Loki got himself under control. He didn't turn back to Thor, but put his hands on his belly and stroked.

"Loki, I knew the minute you got pregnant."

Loki's eyes shot open and he jerked is head to look at Thor. His mouth opened in confusion.

Thor smiled grimly and sat on the bed, putting his hand on Loki's stomach, over his own hand. He pressed his hand hard over Loki's belly, and Loki felt magic unlike any he had ever felt course deep into his body. Loki gasped and arched into the magic. It felt light, and electric, and  _wonderful_.

"You. Didn't. Tell. Me. You didn't tell me, your partner, your life mate. What were you hoping to achieve? No, don't speak. I knew _every time_ you got pregnant. I knew about the babies you bore in Asgard. I knew about the babies you lost when you were with the Chitauri. I even knew about the baby you lost when you were in prison in Asgard. I know everything. And yet, you thought you could conceal this baby from me? I have never taken you for a fool, brother mine, but this is a stupidest thing you have ever done in your entire life. I know why you hid the pregnancy, Bucky told me everything. What I don't understand I why you think I wouldn't find out."

Loki looked wide eyes at Thor. He gasped as he felt another tendril of Thor's magic curl in his belly. Thor didn't speak anymore, but waited for Loki. Loki wet his lips.

"I didn't want to hurt you." He whispered.

"You failed." Thor said simply. Loki concealed a wince.

"I was afraid. I was afraid that I would lose the baby, and that it would drive you away from me. I was afraid you would not want this baby, and would not love it like it deserves to be loved. I was afraid that you would tell Odin, and he would come down and take it from me or kill it. I was so afraid, Thor. That's why I didn't tell you."

Thor sat in silence, staring at Loki. Eventually he said, in a hoarse voice "Have you so little faith in my ability to protect you?"

Loki shook his head frantically. "No, no! But Odin is so powerful, and he is king of the Nine Realms! He would kill all of you, everyone in this Tower is he thought they stood in his way! He loathes my children, you must know that!"

"That he does, and even I cannot deny that. But you forget, Loki." Thor leaned down and pressed his forehead to Loki's. Each man closed his eyes and breathed in the unique scent of the other, knowing only that they were always meant to be together. "I am his son and heir. His  _only_ son and heir."

"Cousin Balder-"

"Cousin Balder knows nothing about ruling a kingdom. He would not be suitable. No, Odin knows that I am the next ruler of Asgard, and whatever he may say or do, he must play nice with me otherwise I will renounce my claim to the throne."

Loki frowned in confusion. "I thought you had already done so."

"No, Loki. He, or rather, you, had given me my freedom and left me to do what I want. But I could cut ties with Asgard forever, should I wish to. And that is not something that the Allfather wants."

Loki mulled this over as he absently shifted to the side, allowing Thor to lie down beside him and finally, after many weeks, pull him into his arms. "You would do that for me?" he asked finally, voice very small.

"I would do anything for you and this baby." Thor whispered into Loki's hair. He kissed his cheek and held Loki close, smelling Loki's new smell.

"I should have told you." Loki finally said after a long pause. Thor nodded.

"You should have. But, the truth is known now, and all we can do is adapt to it."

"Do the others know?" 

Thor shook his head. "You can tell them, when Bruce releases you from here is a couple of days."

They lay in silence together, hands over their baby.

The were finally at peace.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

It was gratifying to see Clint, Tony, Pepper and Maria hand Natasha $20 notes when Loki announced he was pregnant. She gave Loki a sly look and winked when she noticed him frowning, settling down into Clint's lap as he grumbled.

They turned the spare bedroom, which Thor and Loki had been using to store their armour into a nursery. Thor and Loki had their biggest public fight when it came to picking out the colour for the walls, and New York was once again subjected to tropical thunderstorms. But a soothing lavender was closed, and all was well.

The Avengers found that having a pregnant person in the Tower was strongly soothing. 

All of them loved the baby from the minute they found out about it.

And the baby loved them back.


End file.
